"Q" for "Queue" and "Quit"

When I was a kid I used to think “why is the spelling of queue so long”? I always wanted it to be
“Que” or much better just the alphabet “Q” then I came up with a wonderful logical explanation for it. The spelling is long as queue is meant to be long. Queue means a line of people , vehicles or any thing waiting for their turn. We understand the meaning of queue like no one else does. We here refers to Indians. We face queues from birth to death. Its like we daily have a practical session in the subject queue at times punctuated by hot vivas read fights. Some times the end result of the experiment is a disaster . At times it is success and that part ,that small part of our lives is called “HappYness!”

The year starts with queue when kids go to a famous stationary store to get their text books , stickers, notebooks , brown sheets and loads of other stuff needed for that year. Many parent kid pairs are queued up and the shopkeeper is almost in tears due to the dilemma he faces every second. During my school days we used to give a list and then go to the Kwality Fast food and  Ice cream parlor  with in the complex . I always used to have a tooty-frooty and a masala dosa. I used to eagerly wait for the year to begin to savor the food. This queue actually led to celebrations. Hence I never bothered much. Those were not the pizza or cappuccino days. Having food outside is a rare event which is as good as a Christmas celebration!

As kids we did not face many queues as we were always accompanied by Mama and Papa. The only queue which felt bad then was the queue at a cinema hall if I want to watch the first day first show. It was a big disappointment to see the counter getting closed and a housefull sign being put up . Feels more worse when you are standing just behind the one who succeeded in getting the last ticket . Feels good when some one suddenly sells his tickets due to change in plans. We as kids used to be satisfied by anything. If movie plan failed we always had time and energy for new and instant plans like going to a park or friends house or just playing in the school ground. Those were simple days before .com’s and .in’s were discovered!

 As days went by queues increased and celebrations decreased as I was on my own and no one would give me the wonderful offer to sit some where when he / she faced the music, I mean the queue.

You need to train your self in gym as you should be strong enough to push and shove! It will be written in big bold letters- “Please stand in queue” at theaters , banks , railway stations , reception counters and so on so forth but people are literally blind to such boards. Every one is in a hurry. Every one wants to overtake you be it a busy road or a jam packed railway station. I have stopped counting the number of times I have fought with people who jump the queues. Do they think they are walking wearing an invisibility cloak? I shout, “Hey ! Hulllllow. We are already waiting here.” I am sure all of you would have shouted this line at some or the other point of your life. Most of the times people who jump the queues are damsels in distress. They look as if they are going to attend the Nobel prize ceremony the same evening and they want to make it on time as they are nominated for “Nobel prize for restlessness”. They intelligently try overtaking you by  simultaneously being busy on their mobile and paying a deaf ear to your ear shattering shouts. I literally feel like slapping such people. I some times fight till my last ounce of energy oozes out and bring them back to where they belong 🙂 which is behind me or some one else 😀 I also excelled in the art of shoving as I need it when some one shoves me.

A random queue joke

The worst possible queues in India are the queues in super markets, malls, cloth stores or any kind of marts where you want to call quits most of the times . There are 100s of billing counters out of which only five work. Among those five two counters don’t have people who can punch the bills. The other two have long queues so you immediately join the queue which is short at the last counter. To your disgust the person behind whom you are standing doesn’t flinch. You poke your head at the billing machine as if you can rectify the issue just by your glare. Nothing happens. He cannot identify the bar code and makes you wait 15more minutes. The long queue in the other counter ends and you are still standing behind the man with bar code fiasco. In such cases I curse the billing machine , the mysterious product which barred the bar code and the person who is happily waiting for his bill sipping a diet coke. I am just holding 5-6 things and waiting for my turn in the queue from half an hour. Some times I just drop my bags there and leave if I am really getting late. Quitting feels better at times rather than getting sandwiched in a queue.

Few “Queue” trues (facts)

  • When ever you change queues the queue you were standing before shifting starts moving faster.
  • Five minutes after quitting and walking out of the shop you check if the queue moved and to your dismay it has moved :-/ Its funny how we feel happy if every one continues being statues but things get better you know 🙂
  • You plan to go to food court by 12 O’clock  as queues in office food courts are also worst. A separate blog post is needed for it. So, you go by sharp 12 but there is some parantha festival or some pongal special lunch and the long snaky queue ends at the main gate of the office.
  • The ATM machine is not working. You go to the ATM in the other end of the road and by the time you come back the machine is up and running.
  • You are asked to wait for your turn in the beauty parlor. You wait patiently for half hour for a five minute threading which is done in installments due to some unattended facial or some others’ long tresses which have to be washed after sharp 15min.
  • You politely ask a person who is running on treadmill in the gym – “Excuse me! How much more time you will be doing?” The offended man replies :” 15min” . You unwillingly do some weights or cycling again. To your horror you see that after 10min the traitor offered the treadmill to his friend. This is a very common scenario in gym and I ended up complaining many times.

These are just few queue facts in India. What is your worst queue experience ? Did you wait patiently or did you call it quits ?

Now life has become easy as people have become lazy and spendthrifts. “Online” is the answer to every thing but there’s nothing like shopping in real. Virtual shopping saves time but we all roll our sleeves to enter the queues and are equipped with patience to face the crowds.

So what is your queue story ?!
This is my 17th post for  “A to Z blogging Challenge 2013” !

Now a PJ : -source “Queue humour”
Q: What do you call a waiting line of little girls’ dolls?
A: A Barbie-queue.

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25 thoughts on “"Q" for "Queue" and "Quit"

  1. I used to keep quiet when someone would jump the queue but now I speak up and let them know that unless you have a medical emergency, stand in the queue and wait for your turn.

  2. Your post took me back to my days in India. The one that irked me the most was waiting for your overseas call to be connected (this was in the days when we had to connect via an operator) – Please wait – you are in queue.

  3. Love that cartoon. As a society we have no respect and regard for the queues. We have Easy Day store in our Apartment Complex and it is forever crowded. Needless to say that there are big queues at the 3 billing counters. Glad that the staff strictly follows the queue system, but still every other day, you would have people coming up in the front and asking the staff to bill their item first as they have only 1 or 2 products to be billed. And they politely refuse. Those who are standing in the queue, isnt their time important?? But we are like that only!

  4. A very nice post. I am completely in agreement with you with regards to how we all are busy and no body really has the time and patience anymore to wait in the queue. I have also experienced a lot of the things mentioned by you, including the queue at the departmental stores (due to which I have move my grocery shopping online) and of course the gym thingy! Another dreadful experience in the Mumbai local where people are in as much hurry to get off the train as they are to board it.

  5. have never been much in local trains but I can imagine how horrible the situation would be 🙂
    ya Gym is like most irritating. Every one wants to use the whole time and create nuisance to others

  6. I hate the queue at the metro station exit. I hate it more when I see the halo-ed ones jumping the queue and coming right up at the exit point ready to swipe their cards. And I hate the ones at Big Bazaar's cash counter..you described that one too well.. sigh…

  7. Very nice post, Afshan. YOu have brought out so well our Indian tendency to disregard queues. Even I have the urge to bop people on the heads when they walk on to the head of the queue. I think it is Amitabh Bachchan's fault. He was the one who said, “Hum jahan khade rehte hain, line wahin se shuru hoti hai.”

  8. The lines here aren't so bad (especially where I currently live, in a smaller town), but it's funny how those rules are still so true! Even when there aren't many lines, you can still have the same problems with the few times you do have lines! 🙂

    #atozchallenge, Kristen's blog: kristenhead.blogspot.com

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